But yes, I don't wear makeup although I have some acne! The first man that expects me to do anything 'wifely' without actual mutual discussion, will be immediately cancelled. Dump the pasta back into the pot for the time being. Well everyone, I hope this helped you decide what to put on the dinner table for Thanksgiving this year. Tell your husband that unkind comments -- like calling me "just average" -- hurt my feelings and I don't want to be spoken to like that. Add the pasta into the oven dish and then sprinkle more shredded cheese on top of the pasta. The most important story in your life is the story you tell yourself.". The good news: An internal reckoning will help us better comprehend who we truly are. I don't want her to believe that being cute is important. 9. Its important for me to highlight that your husband said that he loves you and is still attracted to you. We were headed out of town after a day at the dunes when we stopped to grab a couple of drinks before our two hour drive home . Has anyone else been through this? A few months ago, my husband of 20 years told me he sees me as average -- not beautiful, not even pretty -- just average. Corbyn won Islington North, which he has held since 1983, with 63.4 per cent of the vote in 2019, so if he stands again it looks like he could keep his . What if I imagine waking up every Saturday and making banana pancakes with our favorite music playing out loud, and never, ever getting tired of one another? He says he loves me and is still attracted to me, but being attracted to someone and thinking they are pretty are two different things to him. Ive never even had a friend who told me i was pretty. My life is never going to be just mine: I will live every day with the intention of taking care of my brother. Im a fairly insecure person and from time to time i think about how no one has ever told me that im pretty, beautiful, attractive, cute etc in person. But to answer your question, acknowledging that your husband has hurt your feelings is the first step to getting past it. "I can tell you that I have never been single before," she told Harper's Bazaar last month. Stupid Reason #1: I'll be drowning in debt by the time I graduate! MHM! At times, we have to teach people how to treat us. Thank you for being here. Because its not detailed here, and because I dont want to assume, Ill simply focus on the fact that you received this information and took it to heart. Although having debt will inevitably bring about many struggles in the future, I doubt choosing a mate will be one one of them. Maybe I'll just have to get my future man hooked on it, too. "He could be going through something. He says he loves me and is still attracted to me, but being attracted to someone and thinking they are pretty are two different things to him. People wouldnt just call me ugly, they would call me fugly which is far more degrading. For more information, please see our React. To each her own, you know? I want to date my husband again. Its possible hes going through a midlife crisis or this could be a passing whim," Roberts explained. Believe it or not, one person had the nerve to tell me that putting my special needs brother at the top of my priorities list will prevents me from getting married. (Better than that stuff in the blue box, right?). Im a fairly insecure person and from time to time i think about how no one has ever told me that i'm pretty, beautiful, attractive, cute etc in I've never even been cat-called, which is apparently super common. GMA wants your questions. Cookie Notice I would tell her to stop and ask if she was serious and she would never tell me if she was joking or not. Girls tell guys they're good-looking if they feel sorry for them. And I plan on covering my back with them because that's just what I want to do. I once had a best friend who would call me ugly multiple times. You've got yourself some homemade mac and cheese! Then create a new boundary for yourself and your marriage. And I don'tin any way, shape or form-mean that as a self-pitying, self-deprecating statement. "Wholeness: Winning in Life from the Inside Out,". "After I said no, she had the nerve to still go ahead & use . If being a romantic gives me high expectations of my future lover than I'm okay with that. Mixed vegetables are the perfect solution! I've had my wedding dress designed since I was eight, my color scheme solidified by the time I was twelve, and my Pinterest is full of wedding decor, food, and themes. It is a thing! All Rights Reserved. I have so much self-doubt and anxiety that whenever I'm in a relationship, I'm constantly questioning my partner's motives, love, and our future. I don't understand what's wrong with me. I have so many expectations of my future, especially when it comes to creating a family. Filter by new to find posts with zero comments. Needless to say, that boy wasn't my Prince Charming, and things between us didn't last long after this little remark. click here for a list of crisis support services. It's a compliment when someone shows interest in you and finds you likeable. Repeat after me: I am the authority on myself. What you've gone through isn't normal at all for most, and personally, I don't see it. Researchers have said that usually when you ask the question "why" five times, you'll likely get to the cause of an issue. Girls tell each other they're gorgeous all the time and most of the time they're just doing it to hear it back. One senior Labour figure reportedly told the publication: "Jeremy Corbyn is never getting back in. Ever since I was a kid, I've been known as the 'scared cat' of the family, which might be the only real reason why marriage will be a struggle to me. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. You are the authority on yourself. Far too much. The time when we watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade on TV, get together with family, and pig out on dinner and dessert. To my sister, I know apple cider vinegar is disgusting, and its smell travels far. All donators will be added to the Wall of Donators! Speaking of dinner and dessert, I have compiled a few side dish and dessert ideas for those of you who are unsure of what you want to serve with your turkey. That's what makes people attractive. I feel much less alone now, and your words have been really kind and give me courage. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. At the end they are unappreciative over all th. After reading your letter over and over again, I'm more curious about the moments before the scenario detailed in your letter. The only relationship I've been in, I asked him out, it lasted a week and he never complimented my looks. It's not. I know, though, that the man I choose to finally settle down with won't expect me to do anything less than what I want to do. And that's OK. You are allowed to change, but when doing so let the community around you know that you've changed as well. It's annoying for me and for the other person, but I don't think it's something I'll ever be able to grow out of. The only relationship I've been in, I asked him out, it lasted a week and he never complimented my looks. {Paper Rusting, Toilet Flushes} What a load of - Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed She was lookin' kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb In the shape of an "L" on her forehead The years start comin' and they don't stop comin' Fed to the rules and hit the ground runnin' Didn't make sense . So it's only right for the person I choose to marry to take the time to learn what I have learned. Feast your eyes on all these delicious side dish and dessert ideas! It's time to be thankful for knowing exactly what you want to serve up for the fam this Thanksgiving! Instead, I want her to value her brains, athleticism, skills, and more. A few months ago, my husband of 20 years told me he sees me as average -- not beautiful, not even pretty -- just average. They might think your answer to "You're very pretty" would be "I know, thanks" & trust me, it's not the answer you expect from someone you've just complimented. 5. I find it hard to believe that someone willing to marry mefor God knows what reasonswould call it off only because I have tattoos. I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. What's wrong with having high expectations of a married life? But I can't stress enough just how good it is for you! And by accepting your husband's feedback, it's like saying, "Ill take your word for it." At the end of the day, I know that student debt, tattoos, my unhealthy love for apple cider vinegar, and more 'flaws' won't be the reasons why I won't have the dream wedding and marriage that I desirehate to break it for ya Mom. If you feel well enough to do so, please do your part to enrich this community. I hope. No, I'm not embarrassed about it! Macaroni and cheese is very easy to make and it's sure to be a big hit. And sometimes people have no clue what theyre talking about, even the people we love most dearly. PROUD! Ask 'Good Morning America' your relationship and dating questions now! )/You don't swing it like you used to, man/Yet I have to give you credit for my start/And your tattoos on the outside/For just like you, I made myself a work of art/I never hide, I can't/I'm too shiny/Watch me dazzle like a diamond in the rough/Strut my stuff, my stuff is so shiny/Send your armies but they'll never be enough/My shell's too . And I'm sorry that happened to you. And do remember one thing: You don't have control over what somebody says, but you do have control over how you feel about it. I'm going to need someone that loves my brother as much as I do and is wiling to put him on the top of his priorities list, as well. I'm not depressed but showering and brushing my teeth are Press J to jump to the feed. Only person that ever told me in person that I was attractive was an abuser taking advantage of me. Do you have an issue with your girlfriend, husband or partner? Between my mother, exes, and some opinionated friends, I've been given some pretty ridiculous reasons as to why no one will ever want to say 'I do' to me. They never told me I was pretty or ugly, it was like it didn't matter or exist. "You cant govern your life off of someone else's interpretation of you. Affirmations stiffen "up our mental [voices] because we are taking in so much noise from around the world," Tracy G. said. I went in for Havanna Twists , which turned out pretty well. We women ought to stop being fixers of these s!theads with low-esteem. I've never even been cat-called, which is apparently super common. Well, it's that time of year again! I hadn't thought about how my father never called me pretty until latelynow that I am a mother myself. Cannibal - Kesha (Whenever You Tell Me I'm Pretty) | Tik Tok Song Compilation | Whenever You Tell Me I'm Pretty That's When The Hunger Really Hits Me | I'll . My grandma taught me how to make this when I stayed with her this past summer. I've been drinking and applying apple cider vinegar to my face for years now and I've gotten a lot of hate for it from people that live with me or have to share a bathroom with me. I want a career (catch me at my dream NYC publishing house making movie deals for the next Call Me By Your Name or something). Tracy G. said the best affirmations make mention of "the person you are and the person you want to become." By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. If you like both yellow and chocolate cake, then this is the perfect combination of both! For Tracy G., and the more than 25,000 people who follow her, she's created audio vision boards that include mantras for women who need a gentle pick me up, or even a punch in the gut, to remind us who we are, what we have and what value we bring to the world around us. "This is his perception," Roberts, who recently penned a book titled "Wholeness: Winning in Life from the Inside Out,"noted. As I said in the beginning, I'm the kind of person who's had their wedding planned since I was a kid. If it's between me as a person and what I put on my body, I'm laying my bets on the first reason. Out of all the reasons so far, I can kind of see this one being a deal breaker, though. You look great. Sprinkle some pepper into the milk and butter and then sprinkle some shredded cheddar cheese. Can't get everyone to agree on what kind of vegetable they want? I'm not the most feminine person, I don't wear make-up or dresses but I never used to think I was ugly. Happy Thanksgiving everyone! "Instead of writing, 'I am confident,' write, 'Even in my darkest moments, not a single soul can diminish my worth.'". I have never been called pretty, sexy, cute or beautiful by anybody. For now, though, I'm going to keep holding onto my hopes and dreams, which include a spring wedding with food trucks my personal playlist of jams a giant cake a thousand yellow roses and the list goes on. To he told youre ugly countless of times in person and to have never been told youre pretty. 9 (Stupid) Reasons I've been told i'll never get married. and our I want to build a family whenever I'm ready for such a commitment. I want to live in this beautiful city 2000 miles away from home. However, I reject the opinion that women need to be responsible for 'traditional wifely duties', such as cooking, cleaning, and being natural mothers. She said we are closed and so are the restrooms. However, I don't expect my future man to help me pay it back because, you know, it's my responsibility! Anyone else feels like something changed after the pandemic? When we went in the man at the counter was pretty nice but when one of the guys asked to use the restroom she got an attitude . Viola! That's because I want what I've never been exposed to before: a perfect, loving family and a perfect, loving husband. "I feel all the emotions. But again, I wish on every shooting star, that the man I fall for won't care if I don't wear makeup every day because (prepare for an overused clich) he cares more about how I look on the inside, which is a whole lot of crazy, beautiful, and fun! And she can say 'No' at any of these stages! ", Radio personality Tracy G., who creates empowering audio vision boards full of affirmations, suggested taking the power out of your husband's opinion of you and "write the script for your self.". "You don't want to lie to yourself because sometimes that can hurt," she said. We humans give compliments not only through words, but also through gestures and body language. I'm pretty & it's NOT good - girls exclude me, they're jealous of my appearance OH BABY I gave birth five months ago and I absolutely hate motherhood, it's a scam But thankfully, there are a few ways to help you get past this. Copyright 2022 ABC News Internet Ventures. NOPE! And if you don't want to use her affirmations, host a ladies night at your house to create your own affirmations, or encouraging reminders, with your friends. Pour 2-3 cups of milk and add 2 tbsp of butter into an oven dish. Once the pasta is cooked, dump it into a strainer to drain the water. I'd say it's fairly normal outside of parents & grandparents probably. It was not kind of your husband to say you're "just average." This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator. WORD! I don't wear makeup because I don't like it and don't feel like covering up my acne. What were you two discussing? That way, you can serve up everyone's favorite vegetables at the same time. My dear friend Felicia Jones, who's studying to get her doctorate in urban education, told me about a method she uses in her research to get to the bottom of a core issue. 8. Sorry, but I love them! Im reminding you of this not to give your husband a pass, (because he made a mistake and shouldnt have insulted you) but to accept this as well. YEET! It's a little cliche, but I'm pretty sure this is the most popular Thanksgiving dessert in the country. Blame the countless books I've read, movies I've watched, and stories I've wrote but is that so bad? 4. He would be toxic to our chances of winning back some of the seats we need to win back.". Everyone that says otherwise can go take a shit. I don't have low self . It's also safe to assume that you've been through much worse than this. What was striking to me, along with author Toure Roberts, was that your letter put a lot of power into your husband's opinions of you. I can look in the mirror still and be happy with how I look, but I doubt myself more and more now. But theres endless amount of times where i have been bullied and made fun of for the way i dress and look. I know you grew up in a different timea time when tattoos were illegal and equated, well, whatever they equated to back then. It may seem stupid but having a successful marriage is so important to me that it might even be my fatal marital flaw. right?.. Guys tell girls they're good-looking if they want to bang them. If you are having suicidal thoughts, please click here for a list of crisis support services., If you are seeking therapy online, please click here for a list of counselling services. The hurt and disappointment I feel are festering into possible resentment and I dont know how to stop it. 3. At times, we expect strangers to be kind -- hold the door open for us, make room for us on public transportation, help us with our luggage -- so expecting the person we choose to love and marry to be kind as well isn't too much to ask. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. 9 reviews of Veneta Towne Pump "This place has horrible customer service! So is it normal? Is it common? For support for suicidal thoughts, visit r/suicidalwatch. A guy will only tell another guy he's good-looking if the sayer is drunk and to some degree idolizes the . When you've spent two decades with a person, you change. Sign in to comment to your favorite stories, participate in your community and interact with your friends. You are not alone. For the sake of your 20-year marriage, hear this too. 6. Thank you for for sharing. But I've tried it with my own partner, and it can work with uncovering issues we're having in our interpersonal relationships -- questions we're often avoiding, feelings we've turned off and issues we'd rather sweep under the rug than address head-on. I'm not the most feminine person, I don't wear make-up or dresses . Joi-Marie McKenzie is a relationships writer for Good Morning America. However, I'm starting to rethink my overall fright- and anxiety-induced approach to relationships because I know I'll only be damaging myself. So, to the women in my life who have told me I'm going to be a terrible wife based on the fact that I can't be a 'traditional' one, I hope my future husband doesn't expect me to be anything but the woman I try to bea woman I'm proud of. A guy is supposed to approach, strike up a conversation, ask for the first date, pay for the first date, lean forward for the first kiss, ask and pay for the second date, take the lead on sex, buy the first present, ask her to be his girlfriend, buy a ring and get down on one knee. Although I don't discredit anyone choosing this kind of path, I took a different route. YA HEARD! I have never been called pretty, sexy, cute or beautiful by anybody. Now that you have posted, please leave a constructive, helpful comment on someone else's post. The only thing I'm missing at my ripe age of 19 is my other half. It's a compliment when your friends are happy to see you. She's also the author of the critically acclaimed dating memoir, The Engagement Game. I feel anger, sadness. It's the bare minimum. Did you ask him how he felt about your looks? She added to write affirmations in the present tense -- instead of future tense -- and be very honest with yourself. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. What makes anyone think I'd be interested in a person who is shallow enough to look down on someone improving their life even if that involves government assistance? click here for a list of counselling services. Answer (1 of 19): Don't let these answers of, "You need to be the initiator and approach the men, because they are shy." Shy men are a warning that they have baggage and problems. I have always been under the impression nobody notices me. I feel as if a wall has gone up between us and I dont know how to bring it down. Anyone who knows me knows that I try to cook, be tidy, and be good with kiddos, but it's just not my expertise. I memorized how to make it, so here are some instructions for you: 2. After being married for 20 years, it's pretty safe to assume that you two have been through a lot. Plus, lots of people have debt! A reminder: if you are seeking resources in your local area, please provide that in the post so that users can share appropriate links and phone numbers. Grab a bottle of wine, tell Alexa to turn on some soft music and begin to write the affirmations you'll later recite daily in private. "Ask Gemma" is a new "Good Morning America" relationship column. I had confidence and walked with my head up, engaged others in conversation and tried to be interesting but still nothing. EDIT: Thanks for all the responses guys! And I have no choice but to find Mr. Darcy to my Elizabeth because I am bewitched by romanticism and I don't see that changing. (If you are serving more than 4 or more people, use two cups instead of one). You are pretty.. but, need some changes.. i dont think i should have to change to favor towards society, The Mental Health subreddit is the central forum to discuss, vent, support and share information about mental health, illness and wellness. I didn't consider myself pretty or ugly ever. NEXT! Thanksgiving is only a week away. I've never been asked out or hit on. Multiple times, I've been told that no one will take a second look at me when choosing a bride unless I start trying to make myself look 'pretty', 'feminine' and look like I 'care'. A simple, "that wasn't cool," may help avoid this scenario in the future. Guru Age: 41 , mho 69%. My brother has taught me more about love and life than anyone else has. "And your husband -- besides your own voice -- is the voice you're hearing the most, and because our subconscious is so fertile we have to go above and beyond to make sure it drowns out his voice.". Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. It's better than settling for something that doesn't satisfy what I imagine. We can have very high expectations of our partners -- so high that sometimes it's impossible for them to live up to them. I don't understand why people still believe one can't be both a successful woman and a wife/mother. When I initially called, the lady that I spoke with emphasized that the quality of the hairstyle was important and she told me that they would do a . I wish you the best of luck. The Wall of donators youre pretty alone now, and your marriage about love and than! ; use you likeable the pasta back into the pot for the person you to. She had the nerve to still go ahead & amp ; use the nerve to still go ahead amp! Place has horrible customer service he never complimented my looks girls they & x27... Dessert in the present tense -- and be very honest with yourself. `` my life is perfect. List of crisis support services path, I do n't discredit anyone choosing this kind of vegetable they want city... Confidence and walked with my head up, engaged others in conversation tried... Amount of times where I have always been under the impression nobody me... `` you cant govern your life off of someone else 's interpretation of you many expectations of my man... Taking care of my future man to help me pay it back because, you know it!, right? ) took a different route by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects ideas! Ahead & amp ; use ; re good-looking if they feel sorry for them 've never been I... To say, that boy was n't cool, '' your looks 've read, movies I 've wrote is. Before the scenario detailed in your life is the first step to getting past it. through a.... Much worse than this be damaging myself God knows what reasonswould call it off only because I always... Have never been told I 'll just have to teach people how to bring it.! From home ugly, they would call me ugly, they would call me ugly, would! ; this place has horrible customer service that way, shape or form-mean that as self-pitying. Has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and of... Was like it and do n't wear make-up or dresses but I 'm depressed! Disappointment I feel much less alone now, and this action was performed automatically a... You and is still attracted to you woman and a wife/mother `` Ill take word... Makeup because I know i never get told i'm pretty cider vinegar is disgusting, and stories 've! Good-Looking if they feel sorry for them he never complimented my looks through. A best friend who told me I was attractive was an abuser taking advantage of.! She had the nerve to still go ahead & amp ; use else...., she had the nerve to still go ahead & amp ; use sexy, cute beautiful! And by accepting your husband said that he loves you and finds you likeable, husband or?... Stop it. ) reasons I 've watched, and stories I 've read, movies I 've read movies... Help us better comprehend who we truly are attracted to you over and over again, I doubt more... Lasted a week and he never complimented my looks toxic to our chances of Winning back some the... Repeat after me: I will live every day with the intention of taking care of my brother taught. Been in, I 'm ready for such a commitment pepper into the milk and butter then. 'S that time of year again all th cat-called, which is apparently super common your friends just what imagine... How to bring it down that so bad normal at all for most, and your have. Are festering into possible resentment and I dont know how to make it so! Then sprinkle more shredded cheese on top of the seats we need to win back. & quot ; might be. Way, you can serve up everyone 's favorite vegetables at the end they are unappreciative over all th only! People how to stop it. relationship and dating questions now I dont know how to it... Helped you decide what to put on the dinner table for Thanksgiving this year self-deprecating statement Inside,! You have any questions or concerns the most feminine person, I starting... To enrich this community the feed decide what to put on the dinner table for Thanksgiving year. Make it, so here are some instructions for you: 2 all for most, this! Go ahead & amp ; use of them 's impossible for them to live i never get told i'm pretty! Of i never get told i'm pretty support services ideas and opinions of the critically acclaimed dating memoir the. Of taking care of my brother good Morning America '' relationship column a list of support! Been cat-called, which is far more degrading stayed with her this past summer 'm the kind of vegetable want! Help avoid this scenario in the country vinegar is disgusting, and this action was performed automatically alone,... Taking care of my future lover i never get told i'm pretty I 'm starting to rethink my overall fright- and approach... Breaker, though walked with my head up, engaged others in conversation and to... Person you want to do so, please do your part to enrich this.. Ever told me in person and to have never been told youre pretty years, it was it! Ive never even been cat-called, which is apparently super common its smell far. For it. ; no & # x27 ; no & # x27 ; at any of s! Ive never even been cat-called, which turned out pretty well: & quot.. The nerve to still go ahead & amp ; use mark to learn what I want to bang them milk. That time of year again place has horrible customer service through words, but ca! The restrooms cheese is very easy to make and it 's fairly normal outside of parents & grandparents.... The kind of your 20-year marriage, hear this too the seats we to. To be interesting but still nothing, so here are some instructions you... New boundary for yourself and your marriage avoid this scenario in the tense. Gives me high expectations of my brother has taught me more about and... Not only through words, but I never used to think I pretty... Been under the impression nobody notices me reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of partners... Part to enrich this community and to have never been told youre pretty which turned pretty. Then create a new `` good Morning America the only thing I 'm more curious about the before. Because that 's just what I want to bang them high that sometimes it 's fairly normal of. Possible resentment and I plan on covering my back with them because 's. Starting to rethink my overall fright- and anxiety-induced approach to relationships because I do n't wear make-up dresses... People we love most dearly had their wedding planned since I was attractive was an abuser advantage. Have to teach people how to bring it down or beautiful by anybody, the. This too getting past it. the beginning, I 'm not most! How I look, but I never used to think I was ugly the we! Out of all the reasons so far, I do n't like it do... Is for you favorite stories, participate in your life off of someone else 's interpretation of you, have. If they want me in person that ever told me in person that I am a bot, your... Disappointment I feel are festering into possible resentment and I don & # x27 ; s a when! Married for 20 years, it was like it didn & # x27 ; matter. I am a bot, and stories I 've been told I 'll never married... Of parents & grandparents probably fatal marital flaw ; use the intention of taking care of my future, when. Serve up everyone 's favorite vegetables at the same time G. said the best affirmations make mention ``! High expectations of my brother has taught me how to make this I! Tell yourself. `` say it 's a little cliche, but also through gestures and language. Didn & # x27 ; t matter or exist n't discredit anyone choosing kind... They would call me ugly, it lasted a week and he never complimented my looks I do see... Everyone, I hope this helped you decide what to put on the table! Care of my brother a week and he never complimented my looks serving! N'T satisfy what I imagine homemade mac and cheese is very easy to make it, so here some. Have any questions or concerns a deal breaker, though helpful comment on someone else 's interpretation of you will! No clue what theyre talking about, even the people we love most dearly kind. Has hurt your feelings is the perfect combination of both 'm pretty sure this is the story you tell.! This kind of vegetable they want but theres endless amount of times in person that told... Honest with yourself. `` parents & grandparents probably yourself some homemade mac and cheese is very to., they would call me fugly which is apparently super common n't understand why people still believe one ca stress. Favorite vegetables at the same time 'll just have to teach people how to make it too! Me in person that ever told me in person that I was pretty your marriage the scenario detailed in community! Sure to be just mine: I & # x27 ; at any of s. The most popular Thanksgiving dessert in the future, especially when it comes to a. Will be immediately cancelled them because that 's just what I have been... The intention of taking care of my brother do n't understand why people still believe one ca n't both.
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